LINKS / ARCHIVES

cre dits 2I2'08 FSC W350 aileen aiyin aizhen alfred allan audric azhar benchia boontiang carissa chaoxiang cheow yi cherlyn cheryl christine danying darius darren derek.P diyanah elycia emelia felicia.C felicia.T fiona hairul haisong hanbin haziq hughes huien huini humblepros ian.C ian.T jared jayda jeron jeslynn jiawei jiaxin jiayi.L jiayi(delia) jiaying jieyi jingyong jolene.L jonathan jordan joshua junyuan kelila kenny kristie liqing maungthet mayfan mr.boo nickson nisa noppadol pohhui qinjiang rouyi sally.C sarah sawyi shuwuen siminLeow siminLIM siying sweden tingting.T vanessa.L vivian wenhui wuying xavier xianyun xinmei yingchong yingkiat zexun zhengxin zhihan ziqi
January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

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This is meant for every kaypoh to see and do make up nonsensical things like I'm faking everything if you dare. Go on. I know you do.

1. Egocentric.

Does any pig/moose/duck/hippopotamus reckon I would fall for someone whom I don't even know well? What in nobody's name is the problem with egos? Oh yes, I forgot, they ARE egos. Especially He who wanted to send the message in the first place!
Btw, the definitions of a Stalker are.
- Someone who walks with long stiff strides.
- Someone who stalks game.
- Someone who prowls or sneaks about; usually with unlawful intentions.

Show me dude, the picture you have me walking with long stiff strides or please refer me to the game I stalked. Great. Now I've magically turned into a prowler who has committed crime due to God knows what the unlawful intentions are.

"Cheowyi, I cant breathe without you, I cant drink and eat without you, without thinking of you i cant sleep, so can you be my full time girlfriend?"
Cb you think this is what movie is it. At least if you want to prank people please make a bit sense right, if it's this case you'll be long dead can. D E A D. Oh, so you mean can be full time and part time one lah? If I be part time how? Can anot? I still need time to flirt with others leh. Cb kia. Your brains cannot work at least see which other part of your body can think right.

And fyi, if you want to scold me a fucker, please at least SPELL PROPERLY lah. Duckes nia, Indian word is it. Come on, prove to me I'm a fucker. Prove to me what I have done wrong. Prove to me which part I have did to offend you PREVIOUSLY. Lai lai, you tell me.

2. Reasonless.

I don't make hypothesises taken for granted. I am NOT playing any guessing games. I tried to cheer someone up. I might not understand the feeling of being sad, cos maybe He has more rights to feel sad than I am cos I will never get to undestand how others feel cos maybe I'm not as equal human as everyone else cos I don't know how to put myself into their shoes either literally or figuratively.

K lah sua lah. I get the idea that people love being dao. Cool ma. Oh yes and if you're thinking that I'm referring to myself, yea please go on thinking like that. I'm an underclass gin na, a duckes, a fucker, a stalker, and someone who has at least 5 people calling me lame everyday.

3. Lame.

Yeah, I'm lame, so what? What has any of my problems got to do with anyone of you? If it so happens that you will get as lame as I am if you talk to me, then why the fk should you bother doing that? Nothing gained. I don't need people's sympathy. Go to someone else who needs it, or maybe yourself. COS I DON'T.

And I don't understand why people say "I still can walk!" when you call them lame. My god, it may be funny once, but do you think you're still as, uhm, humourous as you think for the next few times? You OBVIOUSLY know what it means and yet!

To everybody reading this, I'm a fucker who only knows how to talk lame and walk lame as you wish ok. And I have the worst personality ever so if you know that, it's never too late to realise sth bad cos you can change for the better by not talking to someone who's a fucker.

4. -.- ._. =="

Please tell me what's with these faces. Lol.

5. Happiness.

Everyone always say everybody deserves their own happiness. It's not just about you, looker, it's about mine too. I want to be happy. You spoil it. And people also say that it's not others who spoil your happiness, it's you who should learn how to control your own anger.

Hey, your words only went through your thickhead without going through your brain. If others hadn't started something you don't like to see, and doing it OVER again to agitate and stir up your minds, would you even bother to have your day spoilt? Who, besides weirdos, would want to have their own happiness ruined? Now you're telling me.

Look who's talking? Yeah it can't possibly be you cos you should apparently have realised I'm the one talking here. Unless your eyes grow somewhere else one which I can't help two, which I reckon three you don't need it, and you can say I've changed four all I care.

Thee, get me? So who wants to sue me now?

Labels: pain.

8:57 AM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

突然好想你...

Sorry H. Sorry.

Happy Birthday Derek. Thank you.

From the first time I saw Felicia one or two years ago, I've always thought she's great. And she is. I like her really. So glad she's on TV show Little Nyonya!

Not yet wrote NYAA. Not yet wrote Graduating Seniors letters. Not yet packed bag.
Either overdued or due tomorrow. Wonderful.

I feel drained. Exhausted. Very...

LFK took my previous url. Evidence is here. Lol.
Look at that Nehneh.

Labels: birthday., felicia chin., LFK., pain.

9:43 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

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我希望事情将会好起来，
我希望他不再难过，
如果有可能，
我也希望把自己的“快乐”给他和那些痛苦的孤儿，
因为他们比我还更需要“快乐”
也不知道为什么上帝给我“快乐”
简直是浪费罢了 ...

Labels: pain.

12:15 AM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

Hello.

2I2 <3
Rain is pouring down very heavily now with its good friends thunder bolts and streaks of lightning. Outside is cold.. cold.. cold.. Very cold.. cold..

I miss you...

Labels: pain.

8:30 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

Searching.

For some reason, I'm having that feeling again.
For some reason, I feel lonely.
For some reason, I feel down.
For some reason, I feel betrayed.
For some reason, I feel sad.
For some reason, I just feel lost.

It's not that I don't have a clue what the reason is ..
But cannot accept the fact that I'm back to this state again ...
And I don't want to know my results tomorrow..

Everything is in a mess.. I feel like swallowing down hundreds of sleeping pills, and drink to my death...

Labels: pain.

8:01 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

Peaceful.

I have a dream -
It is never to wake up...

Labels: pain.

5:48 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

.............

Oral sucks.. Chinese sucks.. Life sucks.. I suck most...

See me in an NA class next year... Thanks, bye...

I felt like dying at that point of time...

Labels: pain.

6:19 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

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Girl: Slow down, I'm scared.
Guy: No, this is fun.
Girl: No it's not. Please it's too scary!
Guy : Then tell me you love me.
Girl: Fine, I love you. Slow down!
Guy: Now give me a hug.
Girl : -gives a big hug-
Guy: Can you take my helmet off and put it on yourself? It's bugging me.
Girl: Alright, now slow down.
Guy: I love you.
Girl: I love you too, please just slow down now! Please!

(in the paper the next day):

A motorcycle had crashed into a building because of a brake failure.
Two people were on it, but only 1 had survived.

The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized that his brakes
broke, but he didn't want to let the girl know. Instead, he had her say
she loved him and felt her hug one last time, then he had her wear his helmet
so that she would live even though it meant that he would die.

Labels: pain.

9:09 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

It's raining cold.

Thunder and Lightning.

Thank you Aizhen for the wonderful afternoon.

---

Today.

Was.

Brilliant.

(Smile).

(After school; after she came in and out of class)
"Why look so tired? Anything wrong?"
"Huh got meh. No lah." -laughs and walks away-

Sorry Mdm Oen, didn't mean to lie...

In fact.

Everyday.

Is.

I'm happy but angry and frustrated also sad and depressed and all the feelings are mixing and mixing and mixing and mixing and I don't feel like posting anymore... Nobody knows how it feels. No. No. NO.

I really feel like telling you e v e r y t h i n g.

If there was a noun for "pathetic", that would be my name ...

Labels: pain.

9:56 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

...

Today was one of the toughest days of my life...

Suck...

Labels: pain.

10:31 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

Wish upon a star.

Emotions everywhere.

Love is ______________,
What's yesterday, would be yesterday.
And tomorrow would be a totally different thing.

My heart is kicking jumping stomping crushing smashing banging knocking tearing crying.

It's not that I don't want to -.

Will things continue on like this.

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On and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on ...

Podolski rocks.

Watched Money No Enough 2 for the second time, but I still want to watch it again...

I shall keep trying to play Yan Huo over and over again on the piano until I get everything right...

Labels: movies., pain., podolski.

9:33 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

Cb.

cherlyn: haha.
diyanah: ya lah david. haha. how does he look like.
kristie: hahaha. right.
S.A.: give me your email.
jeslynn: ok don't think too much.
diyanah: haha. yes david.
sally: ok.

National Day Celebration. Walked 2.4km. Charity Bazaar.

From Shinan. Otah + fishballs.
Gave him $, didn't take food.
From Bangguo. Marshmallows.
Gave Summary.
From Ruxin. Strawberry + chocolate fondue.
Gave Eleazar.

The rest was from my class' bazaar.

Went up hall. Elycia got first again, retarded right. Many people stood up during the Stand Up for SG. Bushy ~~fell on~~ crushed my left leg when I was sitting down. Orh ceh jin tia leh.

Went swimming at JE complex with Ziqi and Cherlyn. Jiahao, Shawn they all (sec ones) also. They suggested this catching game in the lazy river. Super funny. Ate at KFC then came home.

Eleazar told me something so I called him to confirm it. Yeah, and he told me many things about - and - and - . I hope he talked me through. Because he doesn't give false hopes. These words he said I cannot forget.

"He is _ _ _. He has _(not a noun) already, and he's just _ with _ _. _ is a _. Only _ would _ _. Sooner or later, _________, and I will say ______. I will never let _ bully my _ _. I shall _______."

Fever + Headache + Flu isn't half as painful as Heart, and I thought I was strong. No one needs a sucker.
But thank you very much, Eleazar. Appreciate it a lot. I didnt cry. -smile-

Labels: eleazar., pain.

7:12 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

=)

Geek, IwtswzyT! =)
Summary is very nice=)

---------

我把你的名雕刻在我的心上
再默默的许愿---
一定很快就会结束的
（也或许现在已经结束了）

我很高兴能认识你
也觉得认识你是我的幸运
但是，既然他们那么认为...
...
代我向她致意

我会很努力
努力放弃你
不再想太多
也开心的过着生活

多两年就ok了
我行的=)

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Smile smile smile.
See lah, I told you I not emo one!
=)...

Alfred: No thanks=)
melmelmel: Hello emelia=)
Sally: Got see your tagboard? =)
haziqq.: I kill you on monday. You know what you sent. Pervert. Sicko. No wonder Nadin and Nisa like you. Both N leh. Hahahahaha. Your favourite. Still have Nasuha.
diyanah: Haha=) I want meet him... =(
sarah ;D: Lame=) Ben dan is better than bai chi. Ie, I better than see xieyi=)
Secret Admirer: Haha. Do I know you?

Labels: cherlyn., pain., zhiyong.

9:50 AM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

-

心痛

Lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines lines=(

Labels: pain.

3:51 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

-

Happy Birthday, Nicholas...
Happy belated birthday, Yingxin=)

---

Things would get better... I'm sure I'm sure...

Labels: birthday., pain.

6:58 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

-

我的心痛. 很痛..
很希望见你..
但是不可以...

Today was a happy day=) Even if it wasn't, must think positively..

PE never do anything, only played with Jordan's glowinthedark slime=) Home Economics passed fast and Tingting and me cooked chaoda curry chicken=( Cut my finger while slicing potato and Cheeyuan still say I slice very slow.. After recess was math. Punished and stood outside=( Alfred, Penguin, Cherlyn, Jolene, me, Jiaying, Sally, Ziqi, Leslie!, Cheeyuan and one more guy forgot who le. Oh! Summary=)

English was fun=) Chinese last period.. I know I'm going to get <10marks for the chengyu test because I studied only a bit which didn't help at all... Before teacher left class asked her when I was getting back my phone.. Shouldn't have asked..

Haziq came to school today (he loves the Blowjob sign I gave him!!=)) but Azhar didn't. Never seen him so sick before..

爱你.
就是你.....

Labels: cheeyuan., haziq., jordan., pain.

2:19 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

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Labels: pain.

6:50 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

=)

At Cherlyn house now, Tingting and her using laptop playing maple (-.-) and I using another com.. Haha.. I made them disconnect.. Wooohoooo=)

Today was ok.. Math first period.. Didn't finish my math homework (because of a somebody x) ok ok kidding..) cause I dunno how to do.. But luckily Mrs Tay didn't scold me or anything because I had shooting.. So nice.. Then I have three days to complete.. =)

Third period was science.. Went science lab and paired with Tingting and did dunno what lah.. what bulb connection thing.. Quite fun, lol. Recess drink half a can then dunno where the can go le when I came back.. Maybe somebody went to drink it.. -.- We have close to 300cans already..

After recess was.. Forgot le.. Tingting say is art.. Oh yeah, I was playing Bingo for the whole hour with Jolene.. Played about 15times, nearly won lor.. She cheater..=) Then is english, didn't study spelling.. I didn't even know there was spelling.. Got 18/25..

Last period Chinese.. Teacher told us why we lost and some people looked as if they wanted to cry.. Sad lor.. Because from 2i1 - 2i5 only our class didn't get in...=( But I no feeling cos I was only the audience.. I just hope our class wouldn't feel so sad and cheer up..=) Then teacher told us a story, and school end le..

Monday holiday cos of Youth Day.. Zzz..

Zhixian said C Pistol Girls (Jeslynn, Shilin, Qiyun, reserve- Valencia) shot 5th in either Nationals or West Zone.. And Jayda told me that C Rifle Guys (Darryl, Sweden, Yeowyong, reserve- Jareld) shot 2nd in West Zone, same as us.. Lol.. Nanyang beat us lor.. No offence but I so bu shuang.. I want to win them next year...

And I cannot stand guys who think that they are so handsome when they are not, then always act cool act cool one.. Kns no offence again lah but I don't like.. Really what... Then they keep comb comb comb their fringe, or like act paikia then alot of the girls will go crazy over them... -.-

Especially the golden hair guy with piercing, Soksan, Jayda and I saw at Safra LAN, then Soksan say he very shuai.. Maybe Jayda also thinks so too.. But I think he is damn gay lor and keep pretend he very handsome.. Eeyer.. Paiseh lah, no offence lah really..

Going back school later, cos Tingting say go there see them play, and Cherlyn got extra bat also.. Then Teotingpok was like, "Then, maybe you can... kao lu huan CCA!" Hahaha, funny lor she..

I cried yesterday when I saw what you said cos I was very very touched... Don't know why... I nearly told you what I've wanted to say for a long time, but I didn't cos I didn't dare...

I... love...... you............

Labels: cherlyn., jayda., mrs tay., pain., Safra., shooting., tingting.

3:39 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

Pain...

Dejected.
He isn't like what he was the last time. This is how I feel, and I think his feelings have changed.
Look at a brighter side.
1. Experienced pain known yet again what it's like.
2. He would be happy...
3. She would be even happier..
4. More happiness in the world...

Anxiety.
Tomorrow's the day of shooting competition. People are giving faces. People are giving pressure. People are giving you a hard time, just like how they think we have given them a hard time too. Tomorrow's the big day. I have no confidence.
Look at a brighter side.
1. People could prove that they were right about us being slackers.
2. Skip class.
3. Good luck with Ms Chan's Eye from Greece=)
4. Support from some teachers and friends.
5. There is still a chance.

Guilt.
What happened just now in the bus wasn't expected. Laughter filled the bus, until people on phones started to feel irritated. Joy turned hatred.
Look at a brighter side.
1. Things should be fine now.
2. I don't have to face the people tomorrow.
3. It may not be of use, but I did apologise on behalf of them.

Look at a brighter side.
All these are over.

I just have to concentrate in shooting well tomorrow.

...

...

...

我还是很害怕!!!!
我还是不能说不爱他了就不爱!!!!
事情不是那么简单的..
我一边想着比赛，一边想着现在和以前的你，一边往上天空看，眼泪也落下来了...
如果我射抢射不好怎么办!!
如果我还是放不过你怎么办!!
我的心很辛苦，很难过，你不知道发生什么事，就不要跟我kaobeikaobu给我脸色看or be so pajiao can or not?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

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Labels: hatred., pain., shooting.

9:59 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

-

LOVE =(

Labels: pain.

11:43 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.