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January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009

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Pain...

Dejected.
He isn't like what he was the last time. This is how I feel, and I think his feelings have changed.
Look at a brighter side.
1. Experienced pain known yet again what it's like.
2. He would be happy...
3. She would be even happier..
4. More happiness in the world...

Anxiety.
Tomorrow's the day of shooting competition. People are giving faces. People are giving pressure. People are giving you a hard time, just like how they think we have given them a hard time too. Tomorrow's the big day. I have no confidence.
Look at a brighter side.
1. People could prove that they were right about us being slackers.
2. Skip class.
3. Good luck with Ms Chan's Eye from Greece=)
4. Support from some teachers and friends.
5. There is still a chance.

Guilt.
What happened just now in the bus wasn't expected. Laughter filled the bus, until people on phones started to feel irritated. Joy turned hatred.
Look at a brighter side.
1. Things should be fine now.
2. I don't have to face the people tomorrow.
3. It may not be of use, but I did apologise on behalf of them.

Look at a brighter side.
All these are over.

I just have to concentrate in shooting well tomorrow.

...

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我还是很害怕!!!!
我还是不能说不爱他了就不爱!!!!
事情不是那么简单的..
我一边想着比赛，一边想着现在和以前的你，一边往上天空看，眼泪也落下来了...
如果我射抢射不好怎么办!!
如果我还是放不过你怎么办!!
我的心很辛苦，很难过，你不知道发生什么事，就不要跟我kaobeikaobu给我脸色看or be so pajiao can or not?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

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Labels: hatred., pain., shooting.

9:59 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

Drum rolls =)

The clouds today were blurry, but pretty =)

HOw I wish I could be like the clouds, soaring in the giant paint of blue sky, watching over all the little humans on Earth. I would have no troubles & worries, because all I have to do is float under the golden hues of the brilliant sun and just relax. I would have no pain, because I believe you wouldn't be there to make me shed tears.

If I did, I would turn into a gloomy dark grey, and drops of water will fall. Pitter patter, pitter patter. Some would be little droplets, whereas some would be huge drops of heavy tears coming down. If the situation worsens, bolts of lightning and sounds of thunder would be seen and heard. Crack. Boom.

But, when everything is over, it ends. It all ends. Just like all the love I've been giving you. One day, it might end, just like how quickly the tears stop flowing out. One day, I might just give up and stop this shit once and for all.

One day, I might start hating you as much as how I hate liars, especially those who say they like you when they don't(!!!!!!) mean what they say. It might seem funny to prank people. But it isn't funny to cheat people's feelings or playing around with love.

Love is not a toy for you to play with and then throw aside when you're done with it.

shouts: What is the meaning of this.

Today was quite a fun day.

Morning assembly was better. Geog for the first period. Science after that, no Mr Chan. Then ME. Nisa's group presented first, followed by my group - Me, Jordan, Cherlyn, Wei Hao, Jolene. We did about the chindians. Seriously, there isn't much information about them.

Ate the chocolate tarts. Burst the plastic bag in front of Jeron for fun and he went after me. Lol, crazy guy. English after recess. Did some summary thing and got our tickets for Cultural Night tomorrow. Jeslynn in charge. Did some comprehension for Chinese. So difficult ok. Don't know what the hell they were saying. Got 14/50 for the stupid cheng yu test. Jolene got full marks. Grr.

Math after that. One period lor, but Mrs Tay made us stay till 2. Went to find Jayda, Christine and Joell afterwards. The 2i6 people were also there. Went to range and Molehill and Hui En were there, lol. Shot a while and bao qiang (hold rifle for 10min).

Went to play volleyball - Jayda and Joelly, outside hall. Krispok was also there. Lol, everyone got hyper there. Krispok hit my butt until baluku le lor. Molehill keep laughing, running here & there and stepping on my shoes. I threw some rag at her and it got stuck on a something between second and third floor.

Watched the drummers play the drums. Ahhhhh, so cool! But yesterday's rhythm was nicer. Also saw badminton and table tennis people train. Played badminton with Joelly and the dumbdumb Elycia with Jaymaine and Sandra's rackets a while and after hearing a bit more drumming, went home.

I'm looking forward to tomorrow. God, don't disappoint me.

PS: I'm not some Chao Yi Mee or whatever ok. Don't listen to that Lee Fong King.

Labels: hatred., LFK., shooting., volleyball.

10:14 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

!!!!!!!

scream:
i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you!

You abhorrent blockhead, if not for the fact that we'll still be seeing each other for three more years, i would never have to see your darn face again!
Why does this happen to me almost every day. Why does things have to go wrong when you think that everything will be ok. Why is life so unexpected. God, i'm really tired of these tests you've given me. I know when i'm defeated. I've lost the game. Can you just put a stop to everything. What's the use of having life when you sulk & cry all day and don't have someone to pour out your troubles to. I hate life I hate life I hate life! Sometimes I wonder why God made me live. To face the consequences of having moodswings one after another, each one getting worse than the previous one. I don't need love, care & concern when they turn up to be just a fucking fake. I'm really confused. I don't know where fate is guiding me to. I'm just being pulled along blindly. Can you just tell me what I've bloody done wrong to have gotten into this state of misery. Praying hard each morning and night that the next step would lead to a brighter day doesn't help much. I just end up in the dumps. I dunno what to do. Nobody would also give a damn to lend a real listening ear. I don't want to be like this.

Help.

Labels: hatred., pain.

10:05 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

Idiot.

You think you very smart is it!
You think you very smart is it!!
You think you very smart is it!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Bastard, you were some friend =(
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!!
You think you very smart is it!!!
You think you very smart is it!!
You think you very smart is it!

Labels: hatred., pain.

7:07 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

!

Damn you, don't act smart.

Labels: hatred.

3:23 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.

I hate Chinese.

Who's birthday is it tomorrow?
We'll find out..
~~After the break~~ TOMORROW:D

Ms Dai scolded me today cos I got 42/100 for Chinese test:( Boo her.. Chee Yuan and Eleazar went around school without shoes and socks. Jiaying looks cuter today:) Weather nowadays is cold. Tingting and Bushy wore 'pink shorts' for PE:D

Nothing else to add.

I don't feel sad or anything for the marks I got for chinese, cos I improved.
I don't care what Ms Dai said.

Labels: hatred.

4:46 PM // Out of the darkness and into the sun.